Take it out of the box 1st!

So I bought one of those tongue Joy things and I can't wait to try it out but I'm on a circling pattern for the standard days out of the month. I really am drinking way too much lately as well as smoking too. Yay me! I have become the lush I've always dreamed of. I'm well sexed right now and feeling rather chipper about life's prospects. Now if only I could get this Ferret out of my right eye socket, as he is causing a disturbance in the force. I think I may need a tazer for this.

I never wrote this, trust me.

So for all of you wondering I'm back and better than ever. My batteries just got charged last night and I'm ready to take on the world. I don't know what the last 24 hours has meant to me yet but I'll tell you one thing, I love da punani. Mez well rested hafta a nice night wit me julie. If anything I can hope that this provides the motivation I've been waiting for to get my shit together. Strange that I need someone else around to make me realize I need to do that but whatevuh. ROllerderby was awesome and my brownies kicked ass! Holy Rollers are the best team out there. Bar none. I will soon be fighting my former friend Ivan to the death for Mary Jane's honor (as well as other things). I'm shaken and confused and happy. Awesome like a hot dog!

Can I get a new hip?

I'm doing good here in Austin, and if all goes well I'll have a steady normal job as soon as I'm done with UT. I'm going to Vegas in December! I have one more semester at UT. I'll get paid 30,000 a year. I'm gonna be a pimp I should think. Now if only I could get these little purple things out of my head. I know they're there and they won't stop playing teatherball with my childhood memories. Not only that but they constantly blast this Venga Boys song in my head. You know the one about the bus coming. That song should have never been made. I need to get a fumigator up in there so I can sleep better at night. Any suggestions. Tepidation, maybe? My wrist hurts too and strangely enough it isn't from masturbation. I need a new wrist more than a new hip but I'll take both if you're offering.P.S. I really want someone to get on me about getting my movie list together. If someone would just give me a push or coordinate with me it would be boss. Meh.

Step to you, Honda.

I'm tired of hearing my car click every time I turn the wheel too far. I'm gonna kick my car's ass or fix it. Whatever comes first. I had a date the other night and I achieved the goal of not looking like a complete jack ass. Who'd of thought? She called me and asked about this saturday...I said yes. Rock! I need to drop a class and soon. I missed the only paper we have due in this class due to me never checking a syllabus. Isn't it the professor's job to keep us up to date on something he has already given us in writing at the beginning of the semester? Right, I fucked up. Anyways, after that is done with I need to save up some cash to go to the titty bar with Cunt and Douche. I want to clean up my apt. now that the rain has stopped. I really want the weekend to come so that I can't be held responsible for some things till monday. I'm really a huge slacker now instead of a procrastinator. I am so almost done with school I should really get my act together. But I won't. I really want to start working at the capitol and leave Zen because I am done with food service in my head. Space Dog just ditched Pound and now she has done a bit a talking to me so I think I can Handle the "STEVE" now. He is a very emotionally weak man and can't keep a friend for more than a year. I like to hear these things. I was doing cloud nine until I realized I have to drop a class, other than that I think that everything will be fine if I can clean up the apt. and get my school organized within the next week. That is all my little flaming monkeys of desire. I shall talk to you of my banal life again soon. Tah

Cam the Shrimper.